Three Go Camping on Tokyo Moor

Most Definitely Not By Enid Blyton

(in fact by Jaelle)

We are the famous three...
Seishirou, Hokuto,
Subaru Sumeragi!
We are the famous three...
Always on the case, whereever we are,
Near or far.

Part Nine (with Epilogue)

The next morning, Subaru opened the front of the tent and stared at the soft mass that tumbled inside. "It snowed!" He exclaimed in confusion.

"Snow?" Hokuto wriggled up next to him. "That's not snow, that's cherry blossoms!"

The twins pushed their way through the petals and stood up to survey their campsite, which was buried beneath a light pink layer of blossoms. The first sight that met their eyes was Seishirou lying still on the ground, almost entirely covered by the petals.

"Oh no!" Subaru cried. "Seishirou!"

The older sat up with a jolt, blossoms scattering off him, "Subaru?"

Subaru gave a huge sigh of relief.

"Oh blow!" Seishirou swore, rubbing his eyes. "I must have dozed off." He brushed at the cherry blossoms and stood up stiffly.

"I thought you were..." Subaru sniffled slightly.

"There, there, Subaru, no need to cry," Seishirou soothed him. "You know you can't get rid of me that easily." He glanced around, "Where are the captives?"

The Famous Three set to, and soon dug one of the men out from the fading blooms.

"Where's the other one?" Hokuto asked. "I can't find him at all! AND he was the one who hit Subaru! He must have escaped overnight."

"Blast!" Seishirou swore. "This is all my fault. I'm so annoyed with myself!"

"It's not your fault," Subaru said gently. "He can't have gotten far. The police can catch him.

The remaining man just trembled.

"He looks like he's had a scare," Hokuto observed. Then she smiled, "Perhaps he saw a REAL ghost!"

"Subaru! Seishirou! Hokuto!"

"Uncle Seiichirou!" The Famous Three exclaimed, turning to see their Uncle, accompanied by the police, running towards them.

"Thank heavens you're alright!" He said as he arrived. "I was so terribly worried. One of the shopkeepers called me last night to warn me! I had no idea when I said you could camp out here that there were smugglers in the area!"

"Smugglers?" Seishirou and Subaru echoed.

"That's it!" Hokuto slapped her fist into her hand. "That explains everything. The smugglers must have been using this area as part of their route, and that's why they tried to scare us off. I bet they spread those rumours about the ghost to keep people away!"

"Oh, but the ghosts are real," one of the policemen said.

"Really?" Hokuto's eyes went as wide as saucers.

"Children, this is Police Constable Plod," Seiichirou introduced them.

"The ghosts are real?" Subaru squeaked.

"Oh yes," P.C. Plod told them. "According to local legend, the ghosts of four women haunt these moors, doomed to remain here until they finish all the works they left undone in life. The legend says they weep and wail because they keep inventing new works, and never finish the old ones, so they're doomed to stay here forever! But they're not harmful. All that happens if you encounter them, is that you get a cold feeling and a sense of deep despair."

"Good grief," Hokuto said. "So it's like some kind of paranormal nocturnal emission!"

"I couldn't have put it better myself," Seishirou said.

The Famous Three explained what had happened to the policemen, who took the remaining smuggler into custody and promised to search for the other two, before departing.

"All right you three, pack up your things now," Uncle Seiichirou told him. "I think you've had enough adventures for one holiday! We'll go back to Imonoyama Manor for the rest of your hols. Your Aunt Karen will be glad to see you."

"Yes Uncle Seiichirou," they chorused.

"We'll be back by this afternoon," Seishirou promised.

Desultorily, they began to pack up after he'd left. Hokuto heaved a sigh as they did so.

"And I never _did_ get to meet Pochi," she lamented. "Did you ever buy him that collar like you were going to Seishirou?"

"Yes," Seishirou slipped a hand into his pocket. "I did, but I never got a chance to give it to him." He pulled out a collar and showed it to her. "I even got it engraved."

"'Pochi'," Hokuto read the front of the tag, then flipped it over. "'Property of Seishirou Sakurazuka.' That's so sweet of you Seishirou!"

Subaru also examined it. "He sounds like a cute dog, I wish I'd gotten to meet him," he said wistfully.

"Very cute," Seishirou agreed. "Never mind. Let's hurry and finish packing up."

"It isn't fair!" Hokuto protested, stamping her foot. "Sent back to the Manor for the rest of the hols, and then back to school, so much for our holiday fun!"

"Never mind," Seishirou said comfortingly, "We've had a lot of fun so far, and won't you be glad to see all your old friends back at school?"

"Silly Seishirou," Hokuto giggled. "Don't you remember? We've finished junior school now, and we're both going to new schools."

"Oh yes," Seishirou blinked. "I'd forgotten. Know where you're going yet?"

"Clamp Campus," Hokuto said promptly.

"Well done!" Seishirou was deeply impressed. "That's a top school! I suppose you'll be going there too, Subaru?"

"Er," Subaru blushed. "I'm afraid my marks weren't quite good enough. So, ah..." He stuttered into silence.

Hokuto giggled. "Ooooh, come on Subaru, surely we can tell him the surprise _now_?"

"Surprise?" Seishirou grinned, "I LOVE surprises!"

"Subaru will be going to Sakura Comprehensive!" Hokuto carolled. "He'll be boarding at the same school as YOU!"

Seishirou was stunned, and then a slow smile creeped over his face. "Well, that's MARVELOUS," he exclaimed. "Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"I was nervous," Subaru admitted. "I've never been to an all-boys school before. And, well, you're in a higher year, and you're a Prefect this year, aren't you? I didn't want things to be awkward between us on holiday."

"Nervous?" Seishirou asked despairingly. "Subaru really, you know that absolutely nothing could hurt our friendship." He frowned at Subaru teasingly. "Really Subaru, keeping secrets from your best chum. As a Prefect, I ought to give you detention for that!"

Hokuto giggled. "Don't be too hard on him Seishirou!"

Seishirou shook his head. "He should just be grateful that they got rid of fagging at our school," he said sternly. "I'd take him on myself and work him to the bone!"

"What a pack of lies!" Hokuto exclaimed. "Seishirou is nothing but kind and gentle! You couldn't have asked for a greater honour. Isn't that right Subaru?"

Subaru blushed. "I wouldn't have minded being your fag, Seishirou."

Seishirou laughed and ruffled Subaru's hair. "You can be my unofficial fag then," he said cheerfully. Then he laughed again, "In fact... here you go!" With that, he ceremoniously put the dog collar around Subaru's throat. "A perfect fit!"

Hokuto collapsed in fits of laughter while Subaru blushed crimson and tugged at the collar. "Seishirou!" He protested.

"No, no, I insist!" Seishirou said happily. "There! It's all settled, and I'll expect to see you wearing it at school too! Oh we are going to have so much FUN together."

"I propose a toast!" Hokuto dragged out the last bottles of ginger beer. "To the Famous Three, who will never be separated!" she yelled defiantly.

"To the Famous Three! HURRAH!" They all yelled, clanking the cans together. "HURRAH! HURRAH!"

The End

Subaru: ...
Jaelle: What? Fagging at British boarding schools was an actual practice, although it got stamped out thanks to rampant abuse, and it didn't usually have the connotations that the word does now.
Subaru: You really hate me don't you?
Jaelle: No! I LOVE you.
Jaelle: Because I want you to be _happy_ *snuggles Subaru*. And Seishirou will look after you and all will be well.
Subaru: I still think you hate me.
Jaelle: I could have done worse.
Subaru: I find that hard to believe.
Jaelle: Two words: corporal punishment.
Subaru: ... You're the best friend I've ever had.
Seishirou: I'm discontented.
Jaelle: Oh hush, you got everything else you wanted, be generous.
Seishirou: Hmph.
Subaru: *sobs*
Jaelle: Goodnight everybody!

Author's Notes:

Basically this was an attempt to see how many single entendres I could get into a fic. The answer of course, is waaaay too many. This weird series is presented with fondness to Enid Blyton, who gave me years of enjoyment in the form of Noddy, the Secret Seven, the Famous Five, the Adventure crew, and the people in the Magic Far-Away Tree. In addition to Enid Blyton, I must also credit the Comic Strip and in particular 2 of the episodes from The Comic Strip Presents: "Five Go Mad in Dorset" and "Five Go Mad on Mescalin".

Oh, and the police never DID find the other two smugglers... I wonder what on earth could have happened to them. :-)

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