Juiced Desserts

A Prince of Tennis Fanfiction

By Jaelle

Disclaimer: So not mine.

Pairings: None.

Spoilers: None.

Rating: G. Humor.

All the Ponta in the world wasn't going to be enough to get the taste of Inui's latest batch of juice out of his mouth, Ryoma concluded finally. Looking up from the third can of his favourite drink, he sent an icy glare at the mad scientist of Seishun Gakuen. Inui merely adjusted his glasses and picked at his salad in response.

"Something the matter, Echizen?" Fuji, sitting opposite him, asked gently.

Ryoma fumed silently. Bad enough that he'd lost his match against the tensai and been forced to drink Inui Juice "for his health" (although at least it wasn't Penal Tea), but then both of the older boys had decided to invite themselves along to his after-practice burger run with Momo-senpai. Neither of them had taken their gaze off him since he'd drunk the juice, and Ryoma had the horrible feeling that it wasn't done with him yet. His only consolation was that if a ravening evil alien burst out of his chest as a result of the juice, Inui-senpai was going to be the first to get eaten.

He shifted slightly and their eyes followed the movement.

It was probably too late to run.

Momo-senpai returned with another tray of burgers and Ryoma cast a jaundiced eye at it before stealing a few onion rings. The taste was STILL in his mouth, damn it, and he chewed angrily.

Momo smirked at him, "Something the matter Echizen? Not hungry?"

Ryoma scowled. Just because Momo had been fortunate enough to win his match. Angrily he snagged some more onion rings, daring his senpai to make a comment about his blatant food theft.

"Awww... you're so cute when you sulk," Momo laughed. "Which is fortunate, since you do that a lot. Don't you think it's cute, Fuji-senpai, Inui-senpai?"

"Adorable," Fuji agreed. Inui merely adjusted his glasses and made a comment about aesthetics. Neither of them took their gaze off Ryoma, who was beginning to feel the faint stirrings of panic. These were swiftly overtaken by irritation, as Momo continued to tease him about being little and cute. After having his hair ruffled for the third time (ow!), Ryoma decided that enough was enough.

He carefully tracked the food being crammed into Momo-senpai's mouth and narrowed his eyes. His timing had always been good. On the tennis courts, it had to be. And the time looked pretty good, right about now.

"Ne, Momo-senpai, since you're so much older and know so much, can you tell me about sex?"

For a moment Ryoma wondered if he'd killed his senpai as Momo's eyes bulged, but then he was rewarded with a massive choke and spit-take as the partially-chewed contents of Momo's mouth sprayed across the table, all over Inui, but fortunately missing Fuji (who ducked).

Inui didn't even twitch, but Ryoma saw Fuji's eyes open briefly as he quickly slipped out of his seat.

"I'll go get some napkins," he said casually, letting Momo-senpai's incoherent coughs and apologies cover his escape. He fled the building quietly and ran home, trying not to smirk too widely. That had been beautiful. Almost as good as tennis. He felt vaguely sorry for leaving Momo-senpai behind to face the wrath of Fuji and Inui alone, but he was big enough to look after himself.

Yes indeed, victory tasted good, and nothing, not the taste of the juice which was still in his mouth, the possible future side-effects, nor the fact that he was almost certainly going to DIE when Inui recovered enough to plot his revenge, would take that away from him.

In fact, even the juice didn't taste so bad now. It tasted... nice. Sweet even.

Maybe he'd swing by the clubrooms first to see if there was any of it left.


A/N: Uhh... just a funny mental image which I felt the urge to commit to paper (or the electronic equivalent). And I like sneakybrat!Ryoma, because he's cute that way (yes chibi, you're cute. Get used to it). As for what the juice does... I have no idea, but if Ryoma wants MORE it must be evil and Inui certainly deserves what he got.

Maybe if it's horrible enough the others will think he suffered enough and not seek revenge... I'm stretching, aren't I? Ummm... *spirits Ryoma away to a secure hiding place*

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