Candy Candy Gundam Wing
or 48 hours in a candy factory
By Orla


Disclaimer: I don't own 'em! They belong to Sunrise and a bunch of other people!


Sally Po regarded the people assembled in front of her. "So," she said. "Does anyone have any questions?"

Duo got to his feet. "Just one," he said casually.

"Go ahead."

"Why the %$#^ a candy factory?"

Noin concealed a smile behind her hand. "Well, would _you_ suspect such a place of manufacturing bombs?"

Duo shrugged. "I guess not..."

"Let's get moving," growled Wufei. "We're wasting time here!"

Sally nodded. "Right, you five will investigate the main factory while Noin, Hilde and I look into some of the outer buildings." She clapped her hands together. "Let's go!"

***

Heero crept stealthily inside the main factory and flicked his gaze around the dimly lit area.

There was no one around, just piles of containers, a conveyer belt and several large vats. Heero turned and motioned the others forward.

Trowa slipped inside first and shuffled along the wall, Quatre following. Wufei sniffed disdainfully but also slinked inside, Duo and Heero not far behind.

As soon as they were completely sure that the factory was empty, they started to examine the containers and vats for anything suspicious.

Duo paused by a large box. "Mmmm... Jelly-babies..." he said. "Hey, d'ya think anyone would miss a box or two? Hilde loves these!"

Heero glanced up at him. "No, Duo."

"Just a packet..."

"No Duo."

"But..."

"NO DUO!" snapped everyone else.

Duo sighed. "You guys are no fun..."

***
One hour later:

Sally grinned and, looking quickly over the edge of the desk, she fired a few rounds at her attackers.

A spray of bullets answered her and Sally ducked down joining Hilde and Noin.

Several of the rounds hit the control panel behind them, it fizzed and popped.

Hilde's eyes widened. "It's gonna blow!" she yelped.

"Scramble!" yelled Noin.

The three women made a bolt for the door, firing on their enemies and knocking them down as they ran. Behind them the control panel sparked and...

KaaaaaBOOOOOMMMM!!!

Sally blinked and looked at the plume of flame. "My my... I hope that wasn't anything important." She said.

***

"I don't think there's anything here." Said Quatre.

"No," Trowa agreed. "We've been searching for an hour."

"Waste of time!" snorted Wufei.

"Hey guys, do you think..."

"No, Duo!" Heero grabbed Duo's braid and pulled the other pilot along. "Leave the sweets alone."

"Awwww...."

Trowa paused. "Does anyone hear...?"

There was a grinding noise, all of the Gundam pilots frowned. Quatre's eyes widened.

"The doors!" he cried pointing towards the heavy metal doors at the factory entrance. "They're closing!"

All five bolted for the door, but...

BANG! The doors shut firmly just as Heero reached them. He frowned.

"Hey, hey..." Duo grinned. "This isn't a problem, if they close, they open, right?"

***
Four hours later:

Quatre's eyes were full of worry. "The doors aren't opening..."

Trowa tried another combination. Everyone looked expectant.

***
One hour later:

Wufei punched the doors in disgust. "This is stupid! There must be some other way out!"

Duo nodded wearily. "Yeah, yeah... let's look..."

Heero glared at the doors. "Yes."

***
Two hours later:

The five pilots gathered in the centre of the factory. "No luck," sighed Duo. "There's not another frickin' exit _anywhere_!"

Heero looked at the main doors. "Then we have to keep working on the doors."

Quatre looked upwards. "Has anyone tried the skylights?"

"They won't open." Said Trowa.

Everyone stared at him and he shrugged slightly.

There was a sudden loud growling sound.

Quatre, Trowa, Wufei and Heero looked around. Duo flushed when their eyes rested on him.

"I'm _hungry_!" he said defensively. "We've been here for HOURS!"

"Weak." Sneered Wufei.

"Eating something would be a good idea." Said Quatre.

"Eating what?" Wufei demanded waving his arms to indicate the containers and vats surrounding them. "There's only candy and water!"

Duo licked his lips. "Nothin' wrong with candy!"

Wufei rolled his eyes. "Only you, Maxwell, only you..."

Quatre rifled through some of the containers. "Hey!" he cried. "There's fruit and nut chocolate in here... the fruit and nuts are... ummm... healthy... and toffee apples too..."

Everyone sweatdropped.

***
Two more hours later:

Heero drank his fifth glass of water, trying to wash the sick feeling away. With a slight grimace he stood up and shuffled over to the doors.

Wufei glared down at the others from his perch on top of several large containers. More specifically he glared at Duo who was giggling amongst a large pile of candy wrappers. Trowa was watching Quatre anxiously. The Arabian had consumed quite a large amount of chocolate and was now wavering between nausea and giggle fits.

Wufei closed his eyes and tried to meditate his own nausea away.

***
Three hours later:

"Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!" Duo cackled as he zoomed along the conveyer belt. "WHoooohooooo!!!!"

Quatre watched the braided boy go around for the sixth time and giggled. "Duo's so funny! Doncha think so Trowa? Trowa? TROWA???!!!"

Trowa looked up from examining the door with Heero. "Yes, Quatre?"

"Why are you doing that?" Quatre bounced up to him. "We know it won't open why not come and see what Duo is doing it's so funny and maybe we could try it what do you think? Huh?"

Trowa blinked. "Sugar high." He said. "Ah."

"Maxwell, will you SHUT UP???!!!" screamed Wufei from his perch.

Duo stuck out his tongue. "Don't be such a grump, Wuffie! Lighten up!"

Veins stood out on Wufei's forehead. "WHAT did you CALL me??!!"

"Wuffie! Wuffie! Wuffie!" Duo laughed hysterically.

"KiSAMA!!!" Wufei clenched his fists. "Stop THAT!"

Duo laughed even harder. "Calm down, Wuffie, or you'll have a heart-attack and then you'll never get to make it with Sally!"

Wufei's eyes popped in surprise. "Wh... who... what... what..." he stuttered. "What are you blithering about?!"

"Heheheh..." Duo's violet eyes gleamed. "So you DO like her! Hahahaha! The great Chang Wufei has a crush on a WOMAN!! HAH!"

"Shut the %#$@ UP!"

"Wufei and Sally up a tree..." Duo sang. "K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a..."

"DIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Wufei leaping down, katana in hand, and launching himself at Duo.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!" Duo bolted.

Heero looked at his frantically fleeing friend with Wufei in hot pursuit. "Idiot."

Quatre's eyes filled with tears. "Nononononononono.... you shouldn't fight!" He sniffled and hugged Trowa. "This is so SAAAADDD!"

Trowa sighed. "...."

***
One hour later:

Wufei continued to chase Duo.

Duo continued to run.

Heero tried to ignore them.

Trowa tried to escape Quatre.

Quatre kept crying and clinging to Trowa.

***
One hour later:

Heero got to his feet and glared. How could he be expected to work with all this noise?

"Come back down and FIGHT!!!" Wufei yelled at Duo who had scrambled up a rope and was clinging to it. "Face your punishment like a MAN!"

Duo stuck out his tongue. "Face you when you're swinging that thing around? I ain't _stupid_!"

Heero tossed the wrench in his hand and narrowed his eyes. Carefully he drew back his arm and took aim.

"Nyah, nyah, nyah!!" Duo made faces at Wufei who growled.

Heero let the wrench fly.

"Hahahaha.... *thunk* Ow..." Duo's eyes crossed as the wrench struck his head. With a groan he let go of the rope and fell onto a pile of sacking, unconscious.

Wufei drew in a deep breath. "Justice is served."

Heero went back to work.

***
6 hours later:

Duo opened his eyes and moaned slightly. His head hurt... had he been drinking? And why was his bed so hard? Duo stretched out a hand to wake Hilde... she always knew what to do when he had a hangover. Duo touched warm flesh.

"Oi... Hildey-babe? Wake up, 'kay. 'm in pain an..."

"Snnnooorrrreee."

Duo snatched his hand back. *Hilde doesn't snore... not like _that_!* Wincing at the pain he raised his head.

Heero turned onto his back and muttered in his sleep.

Duo blinked.

Memory kicked him in the head.

"Oh yeah..." Duo looked around and saw he was on a pile of sacking, the other pilots scattered around him. Quatre was resting on Trowa's chest; Wufei was curled up on the edge, holding his sword.

Duo rubbed his forehead and got to his feet. *Ugh... need water... and food...* He looked down at Heero and remembered what his 'friend' had done. *Then... revenge!*

***
Half an hour later:

Heero opened his eyes and frowned. There was a strong smell of chocolate.

"Oh no... Heero!" Quatre was looking at him in concern.

Heero frowned even more and realized that he felt... sticky. He sat up and discovered he was covered, head to toe, in chocolate sauce... with sprinkles. Heero looked around and saw Duo on the other side of the room, laughing hysterically.

"Hahahahahaha!!!" Duo waved a finger at Heero's furious expression. "That'll teach you to knock ME out, Heero!"

Heero's eyes narrowed to slits. "Omae o kurosu!" He pushed himself to his feet and took a step forward... and promptly fell flat on his face.

Duo laughed even harder as Heero picked himself up and saw his feet encased in thick, hardened chocolate.

Trowa stepped forward with a chisel and began to chip at the chocolate. Quatre helped by eating the flakes.

Duo cackled madly, but was brought short by a blade slipping around to the front of his throat.

"Time for dessert, Maxwell." Said Wufei in the braided boy's ear.

***
2 and a half hours later:

"I think I've got it!" cried Hilde triumphantly.

Sally looked relieved. "Finally... I hope that the boys are alright." She stepped forward as the doors opened a fraction.

Sally squeezed inside and promptly tripped over the surprised Heero.

"Sally?" He stood and helped her up. He turned and saw Hilde slipping inside. "How..."

"I tripped the outside lock," said Hilde. "This is designed to be opened from the outside..." her voice trailed off as she took in the spectacle before her.

Sally blinked. "Oh dear..."

Duo was hog-tied to a pillar, his braid stuffed into his mouth, his expression indignant.

Quatre was throwing up in the corner, Trowa stood by him holding a cloth and a glass of water.

Wufei was seated on the edge of a vat and was constructing a noose.

Even Heero seemed the worse for wear. Chocolate stains covered his skin and clothing.

Sally frowned. "Okay, _what_ happened here?"

***

Noin fused the eighth set of wires together and sighed. "The sooner we leave here, the..."

The partially demolished control panel began to fizz and spark. Noin eyed it warily.

"This doesn't look good."

***

Wufei glared at Sally. "You took your time, Woman!"

Sally raised an eyebrow. "Oh? You big strong men needed OUR help?"

Heero frowned. "Let's leave now, before..."

The lights flickered and went out, plunging them into darkness.

"What the...?" Duo cried.

"The shutters on the skylights closed." Observed Trowa.

"The DOOR!" cried Quatre.

With an ominous creak and a loud thud they heard the door shut.

"NOOOOO!!!!" screamed all five pilots.

"Argh!" Hilde stamped her foot. "And it took me AGES to crack the code!"

"Stay calm!" said Sally. "We need to get some light here."

There was a moments fumbling and stumbling as everyone dug into pockets looking for light.

Duo pulled out a lighter, Hilde found a penlight and Sally had a small torch.

"Great," grumbled Wufei. "Not only are we trapped in here, but we're trapped in the _dark_!"

"OOoo is widdle Wuffie scared of the big dark?" Duo teased.

"Maaaaxwell!!!!"

Heero rolled his eyes. "Here we go again..."

***
Half an hour later:

Quatre looked around and smiled as cheerily as possible. "Well, at least we found the emergency torches, right? Now it's not _totally_ dark!"

Hilde sat closer to Duo. "Just creepy." She said in a small voice as she looked at the looming shadows the five emergency torches cast.

Duo put an arm around her. "Cheer up," he said. "Have a chocolate." He handed her a box.

Hilde perked up. "Yum!"

Sally sighed and fished around in a container. "Well... as there's not much else we can do..." she murmured and pulled out a large box.

Heero squinted at the door controls and ignored the others.

***
Two hours later:

"Quatre?"

"Yes, Trowa?"

"What are you eating?"

"Chocolate... I *hic* think..."

Trowa took a chocolate from the box Quatre was holding and bit into it. His eyes widened. "Quatre... these have cherry brandy in them!"

"Rea... *hic*... lly?" Quatre looked down at the scattered boxes in front of him. "Oops."

***
One hour later:

Wufei sat at the edge of the light and glowered. "Disgusting!" He grumbled.

The objects of his disgust glanced over at him.

"Whats his pr'blem?" Hilde asked Duo as she snuggled against him.

"Dunno... but maybe we should go outta Mr Wuffie Tightass' sight!" Duo chuckled. "Lookit his face... betcha he's a..."

Wufei pulled out his katana.

Duo blinked. "Movin' is a _real_ good idea!" He said and pulled Hilde up. "C'mon on, Hildey... let's go an' see what's up else where."

"'Kay." Hilde staggered after him and the two disappeared into the darkness.

Wufei grunted. "Peace at last."

***
One hour later:

Feeling oddly giddy and slightly sick, Sally stumbled over to the doors.

"Heero?" she called.

"Snnnooorrreee..."

Heero was curled up at the base of the door, sleeping. Sally blinked and then smiled.

"Poor kid, he's been working hard..." She took off her jacket and slipped it under Heero's head. "He deserves a break." She murmured and stroked Heero's head in a comforting manner.

Wufei gave up trying to meditate. Duo and Hilde's laughter from a corner of the factory was distracting and he really didn't want to think about what they were up to. He wandered over to the door and paused when he saw Sally kneeling by Heero.

Wufei's eyes narrowed. What was she stroking his head for?

"Woman!" He strode over to her.

Sally saw him and stood up. "Hi," she said swaying a little on her feet.

Wufei sniffed the air. "I smell alcohol..." he looked at her. "Have you been drinking?"

Sally giggled softly. "Nah... eating!" She pulled out a handful of bottle shaped chocolates. "Liquor chocolates!"

Wufei's eyes flashed. "Maxwell and his woman, yes, but YOU? I thought you had more self-control! Obviously I was wrong, you're weak, like..."

"Oh, put a sock in it!" growled Sally and stuffed the handful of liquor chocolates into his mouth.

***
Three hours later:

Heero twitched. There was a voice penetrating his sleep, dragging him back to consciousness.

"Everybody nice, everybody nice..." Duo was singing at the top of his voice and dancing nosily with Hilde who was giggling.

Heero sat up and glared at them. It was a full death glare that promised great pain and suffering. It was also completely ineffectual on Duo and Hilde who were on the biggest sugar high ever with the added bonus of alcohol.

After three minutes of glaring Heero gave up.

"Goodluck and Goooodbyeee!" Duo sang.

Heero winced. He looked around for the others and spotted Trowa and Quatre asleep in a corner.

"Duo," he tapped the dancing boy on the shoulder, narrowly avoiding being whacked on the chin with Duo's braid. "DUO!"

"What?" Duo grinned at his friend. "Come to join the party? Just don't sing Cry for the Dream, will ya?" He laughed.

Heero remained stony-faced. "Duo, we've been in here for 31 hours..."

"Really? That long? Wow... I'm amazed we haven't killed each other yet..."

Heero gritted his teeth. "Yes, amazing... Duo, I have an idea, but I..."

"You NEED ME!!!" Yelped Duo. He hugged Heero. "This is GREAT!"

Hilde's eyes misted. "Oh this is so sweet..."

Heero resisted the urge to throttle Duo... it took alot of willpower. "Yes, you and..."

"TROWA! QUATRE!" Duo yelled. "Quit making out! Heero has a plan!"

Trowa emerged with the blushing Quatre.

"Duo!" Quatre choked. "We were _not_ making... ummm... out!"

Heero pushed away from Duo. "And Wufei and Sally, you two..." he paused. "Where are they?"

***
Fifteen Minutes later:

"This is _wrong_!" Whispered Quatre. "Wufei won't be happy!"

Duo grinned in the dim light of the torch. "I ain't passing up this chance for no one!"

"But you told Heero and Trowa that Wufei and Sally were looking for another exit and now you're telling me..."

Hilde fidgeted beside Duo. "I have to agree with Quatre, Duo. Besides, we both know Wufei and Sally, they're not the _type_!"

Duo looked glum. "Yeah, you're probably right." He sighed and walked behind a vat.

Hilde and Quatre crashed into his back.

"What is it?" Quatre asked.

"Heheheheh..." Duo pointed.

At the furthest end of the factory, seated on some sacking were Wufei and Sally. From the looks of things, Wufei was giving Sally the kissing of her life... or practicing CPR.

Duo smirked. "Not the type, huh?"

Quatre blushed. "Oh my..."

Duo shone the torch full on Wufei and Sally, and wolf-whistled loudly.

***

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Help MEEEEEE!!"

Heero and Trowa looked up as Duo zoomed past them, a knife whizzing over his head. Well, it wasn't surprising that Duo had managed to piss Wufei off again.

Then Sally ran past after Duo; she was carrying Wufei's katana.

Heero and Trowa blinked and looked at each other.

Heero cleared his throat. "Hand me that wire." He said in a neutral voice.

"Certainly." Said Trowa in an equally neutral voice.

***
Three hours later:

Duo was sulking in a corner. Sally had stopped threatening to cut off his braid and Wufei was no longer trying to break every bone in Duo's body. Duo felt that both of them were over-reacting.

Hilde and Quatre had come out of hiding.

Trowa and Heero had finished their... device.

"What's the plan?" Hilde asked.

"Blow open the doors." Said Heero.

Sally, Hilde and Quatre immediately took cover.

Duo toyed with a bottle of chocolate sauce.

Trowa and Heero carefully placed their homemade bomb on the doors.

Duo continued to toss the chocolate sauce.

Trowa, Wufei and Heero backed away.

The chocolate sauce slipped out of Duo's grasp.

The bottle hit the bomb.

The bomb fell and skittered towards a vat of cream.

***
One hour later:

"NO FAIR!!!!!!" screamed Duo from the pillar where he was once again tied up. "IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!!!!"

Everyone paused in their efforts to get the cream and the chocolate sauce off themselves.

"SHUT UP, DUO!!!!!"

***
One hour later:

Sally stepped back and nodded in satisfaction. "Looks good."

Wufei grunted. "It's only what he deserves."

Quatre smiled. "He looks delicious!"

Hilde licked her fingers. "He is!" She smirked.

Trowa put the glazed cherries in place.

"One last item," said Heero lifting a small box. "The sprinkles."

Duo whimpered as Heero emptied the contents of the box over him. "This is UNFAIR!!!" He wailed. "You're all so MEAN!"

Heero's eyes narrowed. "You blew our chances of getting out of here, Duo."

"This is _exactly_ what you deserve!" Stated Wufei firmly.

Everyone regarded Duo. He was encased up to the waist in hardened chocolate, the rest of him was covered in chocolate sauce, cream and candy sprinkles, there were also cherries on the top of his head.

"We'll let you out Duo," Sally assured the morose young man. "Eventually."

Duo looked mournfully at Hilde. "Et tu Hilde?"

She shrugged. "I AM a little mad at you..."

Wufei turned away. "Well, now what?" He asked Heero.

Heero looked at the doors. "We keep trying to open the doors."

Everyone sighed resignedly.

***
Later:

"Heehee... chocolate sauce, cream and Duo!"

"Hilde... that's my... h-hey... H-Hil... ah!"

"Yum!"

"Oh look, a chisel! I can get to the chocolate now!"

"Uh... that looks sharp... You _do_ know..."

"Quit worrying, I'm just going to chip a little off... Right here!"

"AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!"

"Ooopsie, that was a tad close..."

***
Even later (Yes, I'm losing track of time)

"I spy something beginning with... c."

"Chocolate."

"Nope."

"Hey! There's SAUCE in MY HAIR!!! Do you know HOW LONG it takes to WASH?!"

Wufei moved Sally off his shoulder and stomped up to Duo.
"Shut it, Maxwell!" He shoved some chocolates into Duo's mouth.

Hilde giggled and went back to chipping at the chocolate around Duo's legs.

Quatre continued with the game. "Candy?"

"No."

Quatre looked puzzled. "Ummmm...."

"Conveyer belt." Said Heero flatly.

Sally grinned. "You guessed!"

***
Hours later:

CRACK!

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!" Duo kicked the last of the chocolate off his legs. "You thought this could hold ME? The God of Death?"

"He's free." Said Trowa.

Heero handed out the weapons.

Duo laughed and picked Hilde up. "You first, babe!" He kissed her and dropped her into a vat of banana cream.

"DUO!!! I'm going to GET YOU FOR THIS!" She shrieked thrashing around in the cream.

"Hahahahaha!!!" Duo threw back his head.

Sally squirted the strawberry sauce into his open mouth. Then Quatre pelted Duo with peanuts.

"Ack! Hey... what the..." Duo spluttered. His eyes narrowed and he reached for a box of raspberry sauce. "This means WAR!!!"

***

Noin sighed in relief as the doors to the factory began to creak open.

"Finally!" She smiled at the man next to her. "I thought we'd NEVER find the combination!"

Zechs Marquise stretched. "It didn't help that the computers brain got fried."

"Do you think that they're all alright?" Noin asked.

"Sally, Hilde and the boys are professionals," said Zechs confidently as he stepped between the doors. "Despite being trapped for 48 hours I'm sure they will... Ack!"

Zechs reeled back as a large glob of raspberry sauce hit him in the face.

Noin's eyes widened. "What the hell...? Eeep!" She ducked as several peanuts flew at her.

***

Heero blinked as he came out from behind a vat and sunlight hit his eyes. He blinked again when he realized that the doors were...

"The doors are OPEN!!!" Shrieked Quatre bounding up to him. "Well done!"

Heero frowned. "It wasn't me."

Wufei and Sally emerged from their barricade of toffee apple containers.

Trowa wandered into view, supporting Hilde.

Duo ran to the doors. "LIGHT! _Real_ light! Freedom! Hey... It's Zechs and Noin!"

Noin stared at Duo. "Why are you covered in... uh... chocolate sauce and cream?"

Zechs stared at the others as they approached. "What happened?" He asked incredulously.

Sally attempted to tidy her raspberry and peanut covered hair. "Uhhhh... it's a bit hard to explain."

Wufei brushed at his chocolate-stained clothing. "Maxwell is the primary culprit." He glared in Duo's direction.

Noin and Zechs blinked as Hilde tried to squeeze the banana cream out of her clothing, Quatre brushed at his now multicoloured hair, Heero folded his arms and tried to look as if being covered in sauce was normal, and Trowa looked back at them out of a chocolate mask. Then they looked beyond the seven candy-covered people at the wreckage of the factory and sweatdropped.

"The ONLY thing that would make this _whole_ mess worth the pain," said Wufei. "Would be to hear that you have caught the miscreants we were after!"

"Well..." Zechs rubbed the back of his head. "The thing is..."

Noin blushed. "Our intelligence was wrong," she confessed. "We should have hit the ceramics factory across the road..."

There was a brief, but profound silence.

Then...

"WWWWWWHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTT??????????????"

*Thud* Seven people fell over in dead faints.

The End.


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