THE HEAD                Bernard Bolan


     Am             C                 Dm
I'll tell a tale as black as night,as grim as grim can be,
       E
Of the day I paid my mortgage down at the A.M.P.
  Am            C                  Dm
Directed to the fifteenth floor, into the lift I got.
  E                                                      Am
A fellow's head came in after me but the rest of him did not.


The doors closed like a guillotine, the lift flew like a bird,
All the way to the fifteenth floor the head said not a word.
When I got up to the office the mortgage man did say
"Keeping ahead with your payments,sir?",then he turned his head away.

Chorus 1:
A                         F#m
Just a little head,nearly round and rather red,
F                               A
Came into my lift and life that day.
                              D          A
Just a little head,but as the A.M.P. man said,
     Bm                           Bbm
"Not wishing to seem funny,but we only want your money,
          E                               Am
"And we'd rather that you took your head away".


When I got back to the entrance hall the crowd had formed a queue
Which stretched right up to Hunter St., the headless man to view.
When I walked out with my new-found friend not a word was said,
So busy with his body no-one bothered with his head.
Once away fram all the crush I studied my new head:
With piggy eyes and double chin he must have been well-fed.
He looked a trifle thirsty, and a pub I did percieve,
So I bought my friend a schooner, but he leaked all down my sleeve.

Just a little head, nearly round and very dead,
The fruits of automation's gentle arts.
Just a little head, but as the ambulance man said,
"Well I'm very good with shoulders, and with backbones bent by boulders,
"But there's little one can do without the parts."


Like Anne Boleyn I walked around the Stock Exchange that day.
The market fell, and with the smell the brokers moved away.
I went up to the Library, and a chappie grabbed my sleeve.
It'll have to stay out here", he said, "collect it when you leave".
But in the end, like all good things, our friendship had to cease,
So I took my head to Phillips St., to the Sergeant of Police.
He sent me first to Homicide, and then to C.I.B,
And finally, Lost Property, who'd got another three!

Just a little head, so be careful where you tread
If you step round to the cop-shop any day.
Just a little head, but as the Chief Inspector said,
"It's been noted and inspected, and if it is not collected,
"You can come and take your bloody head away".