My name is Brian and I'm an addict. I choose not to use drugs today. These two sentences give me the right to belong to NA. In the 12 Traditions of Narcotics Anonymous, it says "The only requirement for membership is the desire to stop using". I have that desire.
I spent 14 years in active addiction, and for almost every day of those 14 years I used drugs. When I first started using, I thought they were the greatest thing on earth. I still remember thinking that first time that I would never need to rely on anyone to make me happy ever again. All I needed was my drugs. I used daily from the start and tried whatever drug was going. I had favourites but the important thing was to get wasted.
Within a year, I knew I was in trouble and unable to stop. I tried various ways to control my drug use. One time I got my partner to hide my drugs and then almost wrecked the house trying to find them. We never had any money because I spent it on drugs and in the end, left my wife and 4 children, in part at least, because I would be able to spend more on drugs.
I could no longer relate to being straight. Normal for me was to be stoned on drugs. There came a time when I had finally had enough and I realised that I would never stop on my own as I had finally accepted to my very soul that I was powerless over drugs and I needed help.
I went for treatment for drug addiction to the Queen Mary Centre in May of 1988. It was there, in that deeply spiritual and beautiful place, that I found hope for myself and a Higher Power, a loving Presence that is there for me. I was also introduced to the 12 step programme of Narcotics Anonymous. I was told to go to NA when I left treatment if I wanted to stay clean. So I did.
I have stayed clean and sober for nine years now on a daily basis thanks to a loving God and the people in NA.