After a little bit of a false start, TWiF 31 begins! Sarah is continuing up north to visit her wonderful Mother, so Marty is at Casa Del Sarge Skyping in. Martin is relieved; being in the car with Road Rage Queen Sarah for an hour is bad for his blood pressure! The Traffic is getting really bad on the drive to Petaluma, maybe it’s time for the TWiFmobile (A Saab) to get a grade yellow police escort. The TWiT cottage has been upgraded to all digital technology! Sarah takes a few minutes to get used to the new equipment causing twin Sarah’s to appear. But hey, Sarah still loves all things tech. She even prefers them over Shoes! And Sarah loves her shoes, showing off her flash red Salt water sandals. Yes, cheap sandals. In her old age, comfort comes first with her footwear selection.

Martin has been getting more spiritual. After his past year of unemployment and car breakdowns, he’s come to the conclusion that God is the only being that could possibly help him. Marty’s love of tech and God come together with a great new concept – you can Tweet your prayers! Follow @thekotel and message him your prayers and they’ll be printed out and posted on Jerusalem's Western Wall. This Twitter thing is a fad, you could do this before by addressing a plain old envelop to ‘God’. Well, except in California where the letter will show up on Marty’s doorstep.

There is a lot of noise out on the Twitterverse, and Sarah is just fed up with it. Studies have been going on by Pear Analytics and they have uncovered the revolution that 40% of all Tweets’ are pointless, BS drivel. Twitter is pointless. SHOCKING! None of Martin’s tweets are pointless babble, all his posts have crazy pass along value. Well, people retweet his stuff. But doesn’t that just make it a larger pool of babble?

Gamers are getting older and fatter, according to Ron Richards (according to Martin Sargent). A study in the Pacific Northwest shows that the average gamer is a 35 year old chubby man. Marty points out that many people put on the pounds when they reach their mid-30s without gaming. Sarah is starting to notice that already! She is going to start playing more of the Wii Fit, getting up and hitting around with the tennis.

When Sarah is traveling, she longs for her comforts of life. Being in Toronto and not being able to find a toilet is a very uncomfortable situation. Without further ado-do, it’s the Gotta Go Briefcase! From the outside it looks like a standard Briefcase, but open it up and bam! There is a little portable toilet, complete with a little place for your toilet paper and newspaper. Sarah calls it fake, this can’t possibly be real! The proportions are all wrong. The logistics also lead Sarah to call it poo, how would you go about emptying it? All the public trash cans would start to smell really bad.

A Florida woman got duped after being hired on Craigslist to bottle feed and change the diapers of an invalid man. But here’s the catch: he was a perfectly able man, just with a baby fetish. How did that work, did she walk in the first day at work and just start feeding? Well, after a few late payments this man eventually got found out. Turns out it was costing upwards of $600 a week! All this baby talk leads Sarah to tell a tale from her youth. During the 4th grade she dressed up as a baby for Halloween, complete with oversized diapers and a bottle. Her mother found it a bit strange when she wanted to keep using the bottle and take it to school, drinking her apple juice out of it.

The baby boomers are still getting high! Martin hates saying ‘baby boomers’; it has strange memories for him. Anyway, a recent study shows that the 50 – 59 year old age group is increasing their illicit drug use. Yep, those hippies that did the drugs in the 60’s are still puffin’ away. But Sarah’s note: Don’t do drugs, don’t drink and drive. Lead an awesome, healthy life!

UFO sightings go up when UFO movies come out. Boring. Its time for Tweet Beat! Will Sarah FINALLY get out of the longest loosing streak in TWiF history? During the whole charade, Leo Laporte himself shows up and does something to make Marty giggle like he was 12. With so much action, this could be the best TWiF episode in… seven whole days!

TWiF 31 - Go Leo Go!